When a senior student commented to me last week that his Year 12 experience was far worse, and consequently marred more by COVID than last year’s graduating cohort, I was quick to provide him with perspective about the experience of students all around the world. For many students, school closures have not simply been a temporary interference to their education, but an abrupt end; for a mother in Lagos Nigeria her loss of income has meant she doesn’t have money to feed her family let alone pay for the technology and internet required for online learning. For a student in Armenia with a hearing disability, Zoom makes it very hard for him to see sign language via phone. [1] For students in South Africa, aspirations of the youth are crushed by exacerbated tensions that have manifested in riots and even greater repression from authoritarian regimes. [2]
During that conversation, I believed the teachable moment was about perspective; more to the point, that he required to gain some much-needed perspective – about his privilege, about the harsh realities of the world in which we live and about how largely unaffected we, here in Brisbane Australia, are by this COVID pandemic.
But I have been thinking a lot about that conversation since – perhaps you don’t help to build resilience in an adolescent by simply keeping things in perspective. It certainly doesn’t help when teenagers catastrophise; reality checks are important. However, research has shown us that COVID 19 has brought about unprecedented change in the way we organize ourselves socially and in our daily routine. And, no matter where they are in the world, adolescents have also been greatly impacted by the abrupt withdrawal from school, social life and outdoor activities. This stress directly impacts their mental health on account of increased anxiety, changes in their diets and in school dynamics, fear of, or an inability to scale, the COVID problem. [3]
Perhaps to help develop resilience in our children and our adolescents we need to be building in more opportunities for love and joy and hope; generating an understanding that one bad thing, or even a series of bad things, in one part of their life doesn’t mean all of life is bad. The everyday challenges of our lives are not insurmountable, and certainly when we face the more serious challenges that life throws at us, we have the skills and strategies to cope…because fundamentally we have hope that there are better experiences just around the corner.
Because resilience is more than just coping. When you’re resilient, you’re more prepared to seek new ways to overcome your challenges and achieve your goals. Although this might mean taking some risks, it also creates opportunities for growth and greater self-confidence. [4] But why would our children and adolescents seek new ways to overcome challenges if they believe our world is not a good place in which to do so.
As educators, we need to keep finding ways to create opportunities for love and joy and hope. As we help our students navigate their uncertain world, it is important that we help them keep life in perspective but we must also act as non-judgemental sounding boards allowing them to voice their vulnerabilities, encourage them to make mistakes and (as P!nk so aptly suggests) cover them in sunshine so that they may see the many positive opportunities they have available to them that will help make their lives better.
At Moreton Bay Boys’ College those connect and check-in conversations happen with the boys daily; either casually with staff whilst they are on playground duty, informally during form time with their pastoral care teacher, through the exploration of themes, issues and concepts in academic lessons and of course through targeted conversations with the College Chaplain, College Counsellor or Deputy Head of Secondary Student Wellbeing.
At Moreton Bay Boys’ College we understand that as adults, we need to love our young people as they deserve to be seen, as they really are, not based on behaviour (or comments) that they are producing in times of stress and give them hope for their future – because right now, even though the world of our Seniors is marred by lockdowns, postponed formals, and impending external exams – it won’t always be.
The more opportunities we create for our young people to experience love and joy the more hope they will have for the future, and the more adroit they will become at seeing that the world’s been spinning since the beginning, and everything will be alright.[5]
- https://www.hrw.org/news/2021/...
- https://www.theguardian.com/wo...
- https://www.sciencedirect.com/...
- https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/development/social-emotional-development/resilience-in-teens
- https://www.musixmatch.com/